Thoughts on Mothers' Day 2022

Mothers' Day is just a few hours away as I write this and it's been 15 years since my Mum died. To be honest, I'm feeling a bit guilty about the relationship I had with her for several reasons.

We weren't really close, she didn't know how to relate to her kids and consequently I felt emotionally abandoned most of the time - I call my parents helicopter parents because of that.

I don't remember hearing Mum say to me "I love you" and so I very rarely said it back to her. She wrote it in cards and letters but not to my face. Neither of my parents said anything about their feelings that I can remember - they both lived through a world war and probably they seldom heard those words from their parents either. I'm not blaming them but have been thinking a bit about it recently. As adults it's our job to heal ourselves and take responsibility for our own lives. I feel sad that I didn't ask them more questions about their lives.

I feel sad that I didn't tell them I loved them more often and I didn't give back to them an awful lot. By giving back I mean doing special things for them both, just because, in return for all the sacrifices they made for the three of us.

Mum seldom gave much to herself, neither time out from the family or doing something she loved to do, nor buying something she really wanted and that was a reflection of how she felt about herself I guess. She'd say that she couldn't afford it most of the time. She never worked, apart from a few months, for some friends one year. Dad was self employed and the sole earner in the family.

If she was alive now I would make a point of celebrating her by telling her how much I appreciated all she did for me, and giving her things like flowers or chocolates or taking her out for a special meal or just sitting with her and getting her to talk more about her life - the joys and the sorrows. (choking up a bit here).

If you would like to do something nice for your Mum after Mothers' Day, any time of the year, just because of who she is, I have gift vouchers available for my monthly raw lunches. The food is delicious and a feast for your eyes, the company is usually very interesting, she might even be inspired to take more care about her diet too and the best thing is that she won't want to go home for a 'Nana' nap afterwards!

Give me a ring or a text message and I can post a voucher to you or you can collect it before the next lunch on Sunday May 29th.

My phone no is 0211.709.443



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